Deepening the Skill of Facilitating Online Storytelling Circles

For more than six months now, I have been facilitating online storytelling and deep listening circles. Each gathering has been a humbling reminder that this work is not about my words or solutions, but about the field we co-create together. Stories arise, are spoken, and then settle back into the collective. My role is not to provide answers or outcomes, but to hold the container with presence, respect, and steadiness — regardless of whether participants return or move on.

A recent experience deepened my understanding of this. After one circle, I wrote a blog reflecting on themes that had emerged. Although I did not use names or details that could be recognized outside the group, one grandmother still recognized herself and felt exposed. She let me know, with honesty and care, that this hurt her. Her words pressed me to ask the Field whether I had breached confidentiality. The response was clear: “No reprimand. Only refinement.”

Refinement means that even if the outside world cannot identify someone, the person themselves might still feel seen in a way that is uncomfortable. I realized that anonymity alone is not enough. What is asked of me is to lift the personal into the collective — to move from story to theme. For example, rather than repeating the outline of someone’s struggle, I can instead say: “In our circle, a theme arose around ancestry and the paradox of colonizer and colonized. It reminded me of my own lineage, where both realities live side by side. This stirred me to reflect on soul contracts — the unseen agreements we carry across generations.” In this way, the focus shifts from the teller to the wisdom the story awakens for all of us.

This is a refinement of language and of presence. It requires me to trust that the stories themselves are medicine, and that the tellers will find their own next steps when given the space to speak. My task is not to help by easing their pain, but to hold while they give it voice. As I have witnessed, a grandmother once found her own healing step — to reconnect with her cousins — not because I guided her, but because the circle held her story until her own wisdom surfaced.

This morning, in a moment of deep synchronicity, I was given a transcript of a channeling by Pamela Kribbe, where Jeshua reminds us: “Spiritual teaching is all about the frequency teachers hold.” That truth resonates through my whole being. The deepest gift I can offer in these circles is not advice, not outcomes, not even reflections — but frequency. The frequency of presence. The frequency of respect. The frequency of trust in the Field.

So this is my compass as I continue:

• Hold stories without expectation of results.

• Lift personal narratives into collective themes.

• Trust the Field to do the healing.

• Remember that teaching is not in words, but in frequency.

Upgrading my skill in this way — and writing about it so openly — is also my way of helping others feel safe enough to join. For those already attending:
What does it take for you to keep returning to storytelling and deep listening circles?
And for those who have not yet come:
What would it take for you to begin attending?

This is how I continue to deepen the skill of facilitating online storytelling circles — not with perfection, but with humility, listening, and the courage to keep refining.